Homeopathy Tips for 5/24/11 Active Listening

One of the most important traits of a homeopath is being a good listener. This is what we should be able to do best when working with our clients. After all it is their story, not ours that we are interested in. Here are some ideas to perfect the fine art of active listening.

When the client arrives I usually make small talk but observe all of the ways that my client is being once they enter the office space. I ask about their journey or comment on the weather to let them know they are in a personal environment. Once the formalities are done and they are sitting and ready I will ask them to tell me everything I need to know to help them. Often this is quite disarming for them as they search for what to say or where to start. At this time it is VERY important to be an active listener and not be talking at all. Usually the very first thing out of their mouth will be very telling.

If they start to fumble and don’t know where to start, I assure them that there is no right or wrong way to convey their story and that they can begin anywhere. There are no rules. I then wait and listen. If they come with a printed or written list of what they want to talk about I encourage them to put it away and refer to it after they have exhausted everything. They usually don’t forget anything. By doing this I ensure the most natural expression of the vital force as they share.

I have found that the first 5 minutes of any testimony usually reveals much about the case. The uneasy time they experience while getting started is the purest expression of the dis-ease. Once they become comfortable then the dis-ease can be masked much easier. I also write near verbatim what is being said especially in the beginning part of the case. This allows them to focus on their delivery without any interruption from myself. I am active in my listening and get the transcript written during this time. 

It is amazing to go back to the very first words and look at the case from this perspective after they have given an hour of testimony and the remedy has been given. There is usually a direct correlation to everything about the case revealed in those first few minutes. It is very important to not interrupt during this time.

Active listening lets them know they are being heard without interrupting them. I will often say, “um, or I see, or tell me more.” If there is a lull in their delivery I will not say anything and wait for the next part. This can be unnerving for them. I am very comfortable to sit in silence and wait. Sometimes they need time to process their thoughts or recover from an emotional outbreak. I do not interrupt them during this time. If left alone long enough they will naturally come up with what is important in the next part of their story.

When they are fully involved in their story, especially if they are loquacious (some people love to talk about themselves) I will listen for any key words or themes in what they are saying. After hearing of a few chapters about a person’s life it becomes much easier to see the thread of their experiences. Listen for key word descriptors as they speak about themselves. They are actually giving a portrait of their dis-ease. The struggle of the homeopath is to be able to separate the truth from their falsehood or the health from the dis-ease.

When they are giving their story I do not talk. Once I have heard enough I will go back to the places that they have reported and ask questions of clarification only. I do NOT want to influence their story at any time. I especially refrain from telling my own story or experience. We are together for their benefit and it is their time. Also I do not want to pull them away from their story with being compassionate or judgemental. It is a time to listen and feel what it is to be them in their experience. Having empathy is good but this is not the time to express it. Do nothing to pull them from their story or influence it in any way.

Some systems of homeopathic case taking require a list of questions to investigate the person. I disagree with this approach. There is rarely a case where I do not get all I need to come to a remedy very easily. I prefer to call the “system” I use (if it really is such a system) case receiving. If we are to be unprejudiced observers as Hahnemann explains in the Organon, then we must be active listeners and not active participants in the case. We need to receive their testimony not influence it with questions and ideas that they need to explore. The perfect case comes without any words other than that of the client. They will ALWAYS tell you everything you need to know.

Being patient without an agenda is very important. Once our agenda as a homeopath comes into play then we are not actively just listening but having an influence on the case. I have some students who start to get nervous because they have not heard the thing they need to hear to know what is asking to be healed. I trust completely that all will be revealed. If the homeopath becomes anxious or nervous then they will not be the open vessel to hear and feel the case. They will be processing their own thoughts of the feelings they are generating and not be present for the testimony. We can not do our own processing of emotions at the same time as we are active listeners. We need to be an empty vessel, free of prejudice, patient and trusting that all will be revealed. This approach has never failed me.  

So active listening is having no agenda. It is keeping a quiet mind in a very receptive mode. Naturally thoughts of rubrics and remedies will pop into the mind. When they do I let them go immediately. Until I have heard everything I need to know about what is “asking to be healed”, then it is not the right time to even be considering remedies. The mantra I teach my students is “Let it go” Then they will not miss anything and be in the active mode of listening and not processing their thoughts.

Patience is required. Trust is required. Know that all will be revealed and you will be doing more for your client than you think. You will be leaving the door wide open for the dis-ease to present itself. When it does there will be no mental processes going on that will obscure it. It is like a no mind state where all can be seen. Once this occurs it eventually become as clear as purified water. It is much like watching a clear vessel of muddy water settle. As the mud settles to the bottom, the water becomes less cloudy and eventually is very clear. Then it is very easy to see the dis-ease and know the remedy.